Weddings and Timings
Updated: Mar 12, 2021
I haven't wrote in here in a long time, not because I didn't want to but because I wasn't feeling inspired. I put a lot of pressure on myself to publish posts worth reading and honestly after procrastinating for months I've come to the conclusion that "done is better than perfect". Which to me means that the most important is to give your best, it may not come out exactly as you wanted it to but you need to just keep showing up for yourself to prove that you can do it. There will never be a perfect moment to do something.
And this brings me to the topic of timing, I am 32 years old and there are a lot of things I wish I had accomplished by now, getting married being one of them. I have attended 2 marriages this year and I was a bridesmaid in one of them. I've had a lot of fun in both marriages but I couldn't help but feel a little bit melancholic.
I know now that there are things that I want to do before taking this step, I don't want to do it for the wrong reasons but when you see people that you know and love getting married and having children it just seems that everyone is getting their lives together following the "right steps" and you start feeling a little bit like an outcast. Marriage and kids is seen as the achievement of a successful life (for women ate least), having children and getting married is more celebrated than being professionally successful, and that puts a lot of pressure on women to find someone, follow the script, be "normal". And it's also a big dent in our self esteem because we start asking ourselves "what is wrong with me? "Why is my life not going like everyone else's?"
But in fact there is nothing wrong, I am learning that we are not all supposed to do things the same way, our timings are different and we don't prioritize the same things. There are things that life is giving me now and I am better able to enjoy and appreciate them because I am more mature.
It isn't logic to expect people to attain certain things in life on the deadlines established by society because we are all so different. And even though I understand this in a logical sense I still manage to get annoyed when someone asks me, "so when are you getting married?". But little by little I am learning not to pressure myself, to let things follow their natural path. Things will come to me when it's time not when I want them to, and I am sure that it will all make perfect sense when it happens :)
I would love to have your opinion on this topic, don't hesitate to leave me a comment :)